Vigorous Anonymity

We Gotta Get Out of This Place

Posted on: August 20, 2009

Vacation this year was odd.  No other way to put it, it was just unusual.

Jackass was away for the entire week before vacation, so I had the unenviable task of packing up all our shit for the trip.  And if you’ve ever vacationed at the Joisey Shore you know that you really do have to pack up all your shit.  You never know what you’re going to need, and the hotel/condo/house isn’t going to provide it for you.  This is not like staying at a resort hotel somewhere.

The kids and I drove down Thursday night.  Jackass had one more day of a meeting he had been attending and would join us on Friday.  And we were going to be staying until the following Monday, for a total of ten days.

When we arrived at our friend’s condo at 11pm on Thursday night, it was 85 degrees in their.  Their A/C had broken in the 24 hours since they had last been there.  I called Jackass (it’s his friend’s place) and explained the situation, and he promised to call the friend in the morning, but for the night, we were stuck in the heat.  Then, I spent all day Friday trying to get the A/C fixed for the friends.  Calling repairmen, waiting for repairmen, working out arrangements to get it paid for since the friends weren’t there to hand them a credit card.  So that day was lost, and the A/C started working again at 6pm that day.

That was how it began.  But it wasn’t the only reason for it being odd.  The kids are getting too old for this trip, I think.  There’s nothing for them to do, and they are too old to sit and watch TV.  The beach is a great draw, for a few hours, but even that is boring.  Morris doesn’t really read for pleasure, and he gets bored just sitting there.  Even hooked into his iPod, he loses interest fast.

We ate out a lot.  Spent lots of money.  But in the end, we did nothing.  It was boring.  It was peaceful and relaxing for Jackass, (which is the reason we still do this trip) but everyone else was bored.  And I am tired of cooking and cleaning.

For the last bunch of years, I’ve been telling Jackass that, for the money we spend at the shore each year, we could be doing lots of interesting things.  And the kids are missing out – there’s a whole world to see, and we’ve never gone beyond 3 hours from our house.

Then his daughter (my step) told him about their honeymoon, spent in the Dominican Republic.  An all-inclusive resort.  It sounds like heaven.  Absolute heaven.  I checked out the price and it’s about the same as what we spend to go to the shore.  Can you imagine?  It’s nearly the same to drive 3 hours and sit on a beach all day – cooking and cleaning myself – as it is to fly to the Dominican Republic and be waited on for a week.

I explained it to the family.  Morris listened with his mouth open, practically drooling.  And then he said, “I always thought those kinds of trips were outside our budget.”

That made me angry.  They aren’t outside our budget.  They’re outside Jackass’ willingness to try.  HE wants to sit on the beach.  None of us do.

So next year, I’m going to the DR with my kids.  Jackass can come or he can stay.  But I’m going!

And I’m begging you all for recommendations.  Where to stay, what to do – if not the DR, than somewhere comparable.  Tell me your stories!


2 Responses to "We Gotta Get Out of This Place"

Fun! Good for you! If you’re spending the same amount, you might as well get a REAL vacation and experience new things!

My friend went to the DR by herself a few years ago. She’s allergic to everything, including milk and seafood. (Like deathly allergic.)

She ended up having a bad reaction to something from A BUFFET (which included seafood, she had the steak) and tried to convince us that the bartender tried to kill her. I’m just sitting her laughing about it because even if the bartender wanted to take advantage of a single girl, I’m pretty sure he wouldn’t try to kill her first. My friend is an idiot.

Everyone else that I know that has been to the DR says it is AWESOME!

Sounds like a vacation for everyone but you. Cooking and cleaning? Fuck that. Never been to the DR, but i look forward to you going and then telling me all about it.

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  • None
  • TheQueen: Yeah, perhaps next year suggest you ALL just skip the adult gifts and focus on the little ones. I'm sure you won't miss it!
  • kristabella: Yay! You're back!
  • Shania Ring: Out of all of that, the only thing in my head is 20?!? Twenty? I remember a little boy in middle school when I first started reading you. Are you SURE
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