Vigorous Anonymity

Archive for the ‘The Bloggerhood’ Category

So the cruise.  I don’t want to talk about it.  It was…less than stellar.  We’ll not be repeating that.

But that’s not why I’m here.  In fact, I don’t know why I’m here.  But I’ve noticed something, and I feel inclined to comment on it.

Here it is.  NO ONE IS BLOGGING!

I have something like 150 blogs in my reader, and I swear, every day I check it, and there’s 40-something unread posts, and 38 of them are LOL-Cats.  Cats are cute and all but really…what happened to blogging?  I guess I’m glad to know I’m not the only one who gave it up for lent!

There are a few people who post all the time.   You know who you are.  But seriously, the “daily” crowd has dwindled to bi-monthly, and the bi-monthly crowd (me) has dropped off the face of the earth.

So I’m here.  Blogging.

I was blogging before it was fashionable.  No one read it, but I liked doing it. And then the revolution happened and EVERYONE had a blog, and I had a few readers, and the newness drifted away and I was just one more woman with a blog.

Not that it appears to be unfashionable again, I think my interest has been re-piqued.  I hate being a lemming.

This is my first time ever not doing NoBloBlahBlah.  I’m usually such a follower, such a lemming, that I do what everyone else is doing, but this year I smartened up for just long enough to realize a person who posts once a month should not be involved in a “let’s post every day” marathon.

I’m vastly proud of myself.  The truth is, I used to set up the weekends on automatic post because I don’t ever post on the weekends, so I was always a cheater anyway.  I feel much better having gotten that off my chest

I know I have news…something must be going on in my life…I just can’t think what it is or why you’d be interested in hearing it…

I just walked into the lunch room here at the office, because one of the Vice Presidents is visiting today and when he does he orders us all pizza.  And even though I’m not hungry and I like to go out for lunch I was all FREE PIZZA! and went and had some.

I walked in and got myself a slice and started to sit down when the strains of the topic of conversation wafted my way.  The men were talking about the atrocities of the current Presidential administration (their words, not mine) and bemoaning the cost of health care reform.  One of the guys who I spar with on a constant basis saw me and shouted, “Don’t worry about the cost, Candy will pay it.”

I’ve said that to him before.  That I think it’s my responsibility as a tax-paying citizen of this country to help out my brother.  To pay extra to give everyone healthcare, so that maybe – just maybe – the cost the poor lady who works nights at the local McDonalds can afford to take her infant to the doctor for an ear infection.  I know, call me crazy.

So I laugh it off even though the prickles of annoyance are rising up my spine, and I sit down.  And then the VP who was visiting says:

“Can you believe this moron who said that thing about the mammograms?”

Direct quote.  First of all, men sitting around a lunch room talking about mammograms – color me crazy but WTF?  The reason breast cancer hasn’t been cured, IMHO, is because men don’t typically get it.  So let’s not be silly enough to think we believe that you give a damn, gentlemen.

But then the one who made the crack about me paying for healthcare reform personally said:

“Yeah, just the first taste of what healthcare will be like now that our esteemed President is in charge.”

And I said, “That’s it,” got my pizza and walked out.  There was shock.  There were gaping jaws.  And there was my dust.

I know everyone is entitled to their opinion, but I’m entitled to have a free piece of pizza without having to find room to have that shoved down my throat too.

 

Today I got a chain letter in the mail from my direct supervisor at work.  It’s one of those recipe exchange things, like the cookie recipe or the dishtowel thing, where you’re supposed to send it to 20 friends, and add your name to the bottom of the list, and eventually you’ll get 180 dishtowels.  Or something.

Anyway, my boss sent it to me.  She was the second person on the list, so if I hadn’t sent it out, she wouldn’t have gotten any recipes.  And she would have known I was the problem. SO I HAD NO CHOICE!

But the damned thing was supposed to be sent to 20 PEOPLE!  20!!!  Dudes, I don’t know 20 women’s emails off the top of my head…most people correspond through Facebook these days and their emails aren’t glaringly obvious anymore.  Besides that, I DON’T HAVE 20 FRIENDS!  Seriously…I really don’t know 20 women in real life that I could send that to.

Because she’s my boss, she’d already sent it to all the people we work with and are friendly enough with that they won’t be offended.  So I had to come up with 20 real people not connected through work.

I got to about 13 and then I was just stumped.  And so I did it.  I added the names of my blog friends.  I’M SO ASHAMED.

I hope you’ll forgive me, but this was job preservation at it’s most basic.

…a meme appears!  Yay for Mrs. Chili.

1. Is there anybody you just wish would fall off the planet? Oh yes.  In fact, she’s sitting about 6 feet away from me right now.

2. How do you flush the toilet in public? The only public ones I ever use are the ones at work and they flush when you move.  They also flush when you breathe, flush when you sneeze, and flush if you even think about flushing.  Added to the faucet that turns on automatically when you put your hand under it and then doesn’t stop running at full speed for 3 minutes, I think we’re doing our share for the environment!

3. Do you wear your seat belt in the car? Mostly.  (sooo ashamed).  Lately, I’ve taken to driving the distance between my office and the mall right next door without it.  But can I just say in my defense – I am only navigating a parking lot.  No major streets.

4. Do you have a crush on someone? Sigh…I wish I could answer no…

5. Name one thing you worry about running out of. There are several. Toilet paper.  Bathroom Dixie cups.  Butter.  Wine.  Not necessarily in that order.

6. What famous person do you (or other people) think you resemble? When I was young, it was Linda Ronstadt, but now it’s more like Phyllis Diller

7. What is your favourite pizza topping? Bacon!

8. Do you crack your knuckles? I do it when my fingers ache, thinking that what i need is a good cracking to loosen them up and then they just hurt more.  Because I’m stupid like that.

9. What song do you hate the most? There is a new Alice in Chains song that my fave radio station is playing incessantly and I actually have to turn the station when it comes on.  HEAD ACHE!

10. Did just mentioning that song make it get stuck in your head? Luckily, no, because it’s so dischordant I couldn’t possibly hear it in my head anyway.  It has no melody.

11. What are your super powers? I think I get people.  I get why they do things.  What makes them tick.  It’s a blessing and a curse.

12. Peppermint or spearmint? Spearmint.  Wintergreen, if I have a choice.

13. Where are your car keys? That’s an excellent question

14. Last song you listened to? The iPod is on and playing Achilles Last Stand by Zeppelin.

15. What’s your most annoying habit? I clear my throat a lot.  Drives Jackass pretty crazy.

16. Where did you last go on vacation? Stupid question.  It’s always the frigging shore.  But NOT NEXT YEAR!

17. What is your best physical feature? My eyes.

18. What CD is closest to you right now?I don’t know what this means.  Closest in proximity?  Like I could reach up and touch it.  None.  Closest as in – I must listen every day?  None.  I like random/shuffle.  But if I had to choose, I’d say August and Everything After by the Counting Crows.

19. What 3 things can always be found in your refrigerator? Wine, butter and cheese.  I know how to live.

20. What superstition do you believe/practice? I ALWAYS knock wood.  ALWAYS.

21. What colour are your bed sheets? Dark blue.

22. Would you rather be a fish or a bird? I can’t swim, so I guess I better go with bird, but that flying thing looks pretty freaky.

23. Last thing you broke? A nail.

24. What are you having to eat tonight? I think I’ll be making Chicken Parm tonight.

25. What colour shirt are you wearing? Salmon.

26. If you could be doing anything else today, what would you rather be doing? I would be home, attempting to clean my house, and playing a video game.  Sad, I know.

27. Do security cameras make you nervous? What video camera?  ::cue scary music::

28. If you wrote a book about your life, what would the title be? Running With Scissors.

29. Last time you went to a cemetery? Jeez.  I guess 16 years ago when my mother died.  But I have a weird fascination with them.  When I drive by I try to read all the names I can.

30. Last concert you went to? Keane at Radio City Music Hall.

31. Favourite musician(s)/bands you’ve seen in concert? Elton/Billy.  Jimmy Buffet.  Fleetwood Mac.  I’m lame.  But I am going to see Neko Case next month!

32. Next concert you’re planning to attend? Oh.  OK, so I’m going to see Neko Case next month!

33. Do you talk to yourself? Constantly.  First of all, I practice every conversation I might ever have with any individual I might ever have it with out loud.  And I keep up a steady dialog while I work.  It can be maddening to those around me.

34. Have you ever adopted or purchased a pet? I have done both with varying results.  As some of you well know.

35. Have you ever been present when an animal is being born? Yes!  Our first dog, Sable the Wonderdog, had two litters of puppies, both by C-section and when you do that you have to bring an army of people to help rescucitate the pups because the anesthesia knocks them out too.  Which is unfortunately why her entire second litter was still-born and nothing we did could bring them back.  It was devestating.

So that was fun.  Now back to your regular programming.

I’m equal parts excited and terrified at the same time.  Next year, Blogher will be in my neck of the woods.

Excited is easy to understand.  It’s that feeling you get when you know you’re going to be around interesting women and lots of alcohol.  I’m squirmy just thinking about it.

But the terror?  Just as real…

I don’t consider myself a real “blogger” like the rest of you.  I’ve been at it a long time, but never with any real commitment…I get bored with myself and flit away to something else more interesting, and then just as quickly flit back and expect you all to roll with my tides.  I’m very lunar that way.

So who’s going to know me…li’l ole me…at Blogher ’10?  No one, that’s who.  And I have always been the girl who feels left out.  Hell, my 30th high school reunion is this year and I’m on the fence because I’m still not sure those 30 year old high school cliques will have faded.  Can I realy walk up to Lynn Bobo and say hello?  Nah…I don’t think I can.  Just as I will never be able to walk up to The Bloggess and say hello to her either.

So I’m not sure how I feel about this.  I don’t want to be the one who sat home that weekend instead of going to the party all the kids in the neighborhood were invited to, quietly eating microwave popcorn and diet coke and watching Breakfast Club for the 52nd time.  And I don’t want to go and feel like I don’t belong.

Story of my life.



  • None
  • TheQueen: Yeah, perhaps next year suggest you ALL just skip the adult gifts and focus on the little ones. I'm sure you won't miss it!
  • kristabella: Yay! You're back!
  • Shania Ring: Out of all of that, the only thing in my head is 20?!? Twenty? I remember a little boy in middle school when I first started reading you. Are you SURE